The first few days of your new friendship will actually decide whether
your friendship will last forever or will wither away. Now, friendships
might happen automatically, but if you want them to last forever, you
have to do your part. Friendship, like a delicate plant, needs to
be nurtured.
It is much like a potted sapling. It is very small and delicate at the
moment. You have to water it, give it proper fertilizer, place it in
gentle sunshine, etc. so that it thrives.
Even with friendship, you have to do some things. This begins with
your first meeting with the person itself, the ‘breaking the ice’
part. Once you have found a person you like, make sure that you open
up an avenue to meet them again.If it is a class or club, you don’t
have to worry, because you know they will be there again.However,
sometimes friendships happen in the strangest of places, while waiting
for a bus, for example.When you meet people in such uncertain places,
you could close the conversation by giving your name.They will likely
reciprocate by giving theirs. Then, give them your number or ask if
they would like to meet you somewhere, like in a coffee shop, for some
pleasant conversation. Probably set this up for the weekend. This is an
important step, because here is where their genuine interest in you is
shown along.
Even if you are meeting someone at a regular place, make sure you
don’t come on too heavily on them. Let some ‘chance’ conversations
happen between you, and opportunities to meet will occur. Like, you
might accompany on their way home or even take a detour for a bite
somewhere.
Lasting friendships are those that start out on the right foot. We
have already mentioned that, but this will be important throughout
your initial days. It is good manners to listen. Keep everything that
they say in mind. Remember their name, what they do, where they live,
the people that they talk about, etc. You may not realize how
important a good memory is for a lasting friendship. If you remember
things about them during your successive visits, things are going to
be much better.
Don’t sell yourself too much. You might be zealous in making this
person like you, but don’t give out too much information about
yourself. Let your conversation flow.Speak in relation to what they
are speaking. Don’t create topics from the top of your head, just as
fillers. That makes the outing boring.
Also, don’t be too pushy at first. If you have met somewhere, don’t be
too greedy for another outing very soon. Get the right feeling from
them first. If they are eager to meet you again, plan on a nearer
date.Even better ask them to suggest when you would meet next. You
will really have it made if you ask them to bring their other friends along
the next time. That makes it concrete in their mind that you like them
for who they are.
